N396/N400 (updated 24.3.17:close)
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Saturday, 7 January 2017

From a female blog reader:
I'm an ardent reader of ur page and have been a bit hesitant to share my story. Pls keep me anonymous. Here goes... I was dating a nice guy for about 9 years, it was fun and wholesome and he was a very devout and loyal guy, very romantic and understands my love languages which are quality time and acts of service. ‎He was my friend before we started dating so it was easy transitioning back to the friendship because we had such a good rapport. We broke up because he had a bit of a drinking problem and at times got violent, and one day the 10th straw finally broke the camels back and I decided to leave him about 3 years ago. The thing is, I haven't been able to have another relationship since then. I feel that I invested a lot of time and energy in that relationship and just don't have the strength in me anymore. I met a guy last January and decided to give companionship a try. we dated for about 6 months then I had to end it because he was just too clueless and sex obsessed. Not that I minded,but it gets very boring if all u do in a relationship is just eat and have sex,and I hate indecisive guys. I don't need to tell u everything, I appreciate initiative...which this new guy lacked, so I broke up with him. Meanwhile, my ex and I have been communicating daily since that time till date. We r in different states so it's just phone conversations. He still wants me back, but I have no romantic feelings towards him anymore. He's so thoughtful and caring. He buys things for my mom and friends, who are all so in love with him. On all accounts, he's the perfect guy for me and wants me back, but I just don't want to get back because of the 'history' we have. I don't want to feel like I'm with him out of sympathy. He said he has changed and on all accounts I can tell he has. But I'm just not in love. What should I do? Should I be with him because he genuinely loves me and hope love comes back or should I just be alone, because I don't see myself falling in love again. Also, he's a short guy. I never had an issue with it for 9 years while we were dating, but d moment we broke up, it's like the rose coloured petal love goggles I was wearing shattered
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